artschool girlfriend

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

When the working day is done,
Oh, girls
They wanna have fu-hun,
Oh, girls
Just wanna have fun
-Cyndi Lauper

I have been eating like crazy ever since the night Ian (our fitness coach) was sad over something. Well what do you know? It is indeed universal that the best cure for the ladies’ sadness could very well be a bucket of ice creams or anything that has ice cream on it. In our case it was me, Ian and Kitkat (our dietitian) against a whole pack of Moo sandwich ice creams. Considering that I was with model thin chicks, the ice cream was gone in less than 60 seconds. Amazing.

What’s also amazing is how therapeutic ice creams are for women. Ian was able to smile again after our ice cream overload. But then again, it could also have been sugar rush.

And yes the chicken nuggets and quarter pounder are mine.

Love Song

I’m not gonna write you a love song,
‘Cause you asked for it,
‘Cause you need one, you see.
I’m not gonna write you a love song,
‘Cause you tell me it’s,
Make or breaking this.
If you’re on your way,
I’m not gonna write you to stay.
If all you have is leaving,
I’m gonna need a better reason to write you a love song today.
Today.
-Sara Bareilles

Stella Was a Diver and She Was Always Down

She was all right because the sea was so airtight, she broke away
She is all right but she can’t come out tonight, she broke away
She was all right, yeah the sea was so tight, air tight
She broke away, broke away

- Interpol

We went house partying the other night at the Valera Mansion (haha). It was fun and long overdue. We didn’t know what event to celebrate, choices were: Kat and Blaise’s Belated Happy Birthday Parties, Carms and Ced’s Super Advance Happy Birthday Parties or just a Beer Surplus Party. Ced’s dad recently celebrated his nth birthday and was kind enough to leave us overflowing bottles and cans of beer, to my friends’ delight. I haven’t been drinking since I don’t even remember when. And I don’t like the taste of alcohol anymore nor love going home smelling like a drunk. Haha.

However, we managed to down 13 bottles of Red Horse Grande. My friends are unbelievable. That was like 2 cases of Red Horse Grande plus a bottle. We started drinking around 6 or 7 in the evening and packed up around 2am… that was after gyrating heavily to a Flo Ridah song, “Low” with a whole bunch of kids in the premises. Ced’s younger sister was throwing a house party of her own, kids these days.

I was cheating while they were drinking though. I was taking little sips, very well done by me. By the time I’m only on my third cup, I was feeling the kick. I didn’t want to push myself to drink also so there, I cheated my way to 2am. Every time I don’t want to drink I just headed to the pool for a swim as I also promised myself to get reacquainted with the water. Although the moon was up and not the sun which I would’ve wanted more, I took solace in the fact that I am in the water.

While swimming I also realized that my color is now turning to a translucently white pastiness. I don’t look good when I am naturally white. I look like a half-baked Chinese slash whatever blood line it is that is running through my veins. I just don’t look good when I’m whiter. And with that realization, we decided that it has been a while since we had a road trip. I miss the sea and the sea misses me as well. Hopefully by next weekend we will head for Anawangin in Zambales, I’ve heard the beach there is nice and I just had to see it.

But my whole story for the night was that, I don’t know how to dive. For weeks now I am seriously considering to learn how to SCUBA dive. And knowing how to just dive into the water just might be useful, plus Blaise was chiding me that how can I go scuba diving when I don’t know how to dive. I stood for awhile and thought though: scuba divers go into the water backwards, don’t they? I told her that and still I got a “Whatever, just go in and dive!” That was Blaise being supportive, really. I tried diving into the water hundreds of times until my chest, my belly and my legs hurt, meaning to say that I am doing it wrong. The few times I got it right was every time Ced had to literally pull me in to the water, literally.

Ced had me position myself, arms this way, head tucked in, knees bent. He would then place his arm just right under my knees and his other hand holding my now stretched arms to pull me in. He was in the pool while I was on the ledge of the pool. All that effort was to make sure that my hands/head go in first rather that whopping my way into the water, and it worked. I didn’t feel any pain at all and I sliced into the water. Now, the problem remains. Will I ever dive into the water alone? Or I had to bring Ced with me always to make sure that I slice into and not whop into the water? Haha, it is a funny thought right?

When I wasn’t punishing myself by diving, I laid there floating in the water. I remembered being asked this question: “Can you float?” by a diving pro. I just recently met the person and already I was bugging him the whole week regarding my SCUBA dreams. And yes I can float, but again I was disheartened when “floating” may actually mean that I have to float while 30-40 feet under the water. Now that was a scary thought, thanks Blaise. I love you but sometimes you scare me.

The whole night though what you would actually hear amongst the chiding and the hooting, was “Let go, trust yourself and fall!” Now Blaise and I had to laugh. Oh hell no, haha. Now diving suddenly was like a relationship we had ourselves to commit to. It was funny. Although I do find SCUBA diving and diving alone scary there is a part of me who wants to do the whole dive. I want to let go, trust myself, fall and dive. Plus I think it is high time for me to see the life that is under the water. I have been basking in the sun for a long time now; I think Nemo below would want a visit from me, translucent and pasty, though inefficient at diving, still a relentless wannabe.

Photo credits to Neil Que

Send a Message to Her

get used to it don’t lose your head
its all gonna be the same
she knows send a massage to her
she knows get a massage to her
-Beck

I do sign up for subscription mails, some from my favorite bands, musicians, fashion houses, health buff things for work and yes I am also a sucker for the astro stuff. And everytime I check my mail from work, I oftentimes release a soft laughter for receiving mails like the ones above. Are You With Your Sexual Soulmate? One mail asks. Really?

So what’s in my mailbox you asked?

REDS AND YELLOWS. Astrology.com Specials. The one in the red highlight is the winning mail, the ones in yellow highlights are the runner up mails. I don’t remember why I actually signed up for this. Was it because of the free “know yourself better through the stars”? or the Chinese Zodiac offer something. Now it is asking me if I am with my sexual soulmate? Hahahaha. I don’t know why I put myself into this. Sometimes their emails come off very personal, calling me by my first name, Carms, Discover your Kissing Karma one mail read then there was Carms, your 2008 Love Forecast is Here!, with enthusiam. I don’t even know why they are talking about my sexual soulmate, my kissing karma and keeping my passion alive, which are all non-existent by the way. But it gives me a laugh so, I decided to keep my subscription with them.

GREENS. No, I didn’t really sign up for this for myself. I had to collect recipes for my work. I had to see which dishes are nutritious vs. the super calorie dishes. But I find it useful, some recipes I mean, some are easy to make why some are impossible to. I am a wannabe health buff, trying to live it clean and green.

LIGHT BROWN. That’s how we do invites nowadays. State a very catchy subject. Have Beers. Will Party. By the way, the Beer Surplus Party was a blast. Read more here.

SKYBLUE. Yes, I am a woman. Haha. I used to work for this fashion house (Freeway). They give me fashion updates and the chance to join some raffle promos and win amazing stuff. Plus their spokesperson is really convincing. Who wouldn’t want to look like Anne Curtis?? I know I would.

BLUEGREEN. The internet is the closest means I have with my lovers, uhm, musicians. I get to receive their tour dates hoping that I may one day see them play in live concert. I am psyching myself that I will probably get the best surprise of my life to actually see anyone of them (Jose Gonzalez, The Strokes, Interpol and U2) play in a bar or a park, maybe in New York, Tokyo, Hong Kong, wherever they maybe. I dream big. This email from Jose Gonzalez was about an Indie Music Awards where he was to play in New York. I wasn’t able to watch… the live feed, curses &&^%*(@##.

Sunday Driving

Driving on a sunday
tucked in the mellow pace of life…
See, the world that i see

- Rivermaya

Sunday was nice, erratic and unexpected but nice. I’m helping out a good friend to bring a popular local band in here to Guam. Apparently the band was “too cool for me” (me, air quoting). Really, they’re hard to talk to, I mean whoever she is I’m corresponding with. And I think that is one reason why artists’ get bad mouthed. They don’t even know how they are being presented to “contractor’s” like me. I just wish we could get this over and done with. I just want to get their stuff fixed and my friend to get settled and happy.

Anyway, the other glitch in my weekend, aside from the band thing, was that I wasn’t able to go to church. I hate missing Sunday masses. I was out to close a “business deal” with my creative team buds. We spent the whole afternoon in a coffee shop in Manila. They were programming and encoding and stuff while I was just sitting there, waiting. It suck’d. I really wanted to go to mass. I was thinking to hear one in a nearby school but I won’t be able to come in though because I was inappropriately dressed for church. Now I feel so guilty for not going to church. As much as possible I always make my Sundays free. And also, it always sucks to miss Sunday masses.

And then after 10 years in the coffee shop, we were able to present what the team was able to finish. And we’re glad that our client loved what we did. For a while he was complaining that my bud overcharged him, which isn’t all true. He got the cheapest deal from us! I’m so sure that his partners in the US would be pretty much impressed with what we have and he would realize he had us for cheap labor. Haha. But seriously, I’m glad that he liked what we had for him.

Then, we eventually had to go home. It had been raining since late afternoon, the ground was wet, the air smelled of something and it was cold. And I was inappropriately dressed to walk on dark streets so I wasn’t even close to thinking of commuting on my way home. I hailed a cab and sank in the seat, as in sank after a very long day.

The fun began though when Manong Taxi Driver of the E&F cab impressed me that he knew foreign languages.  It started when he asked me the direction to our place, I immediately noticed that he’s not from the city. He asked, was it because of his intonation? And I said yeah, he mentioned he was from Southern Samar and they speak Cebuano. Being a sucker for culture, languages and such, I asked him for some quick words he could teach me. He taught me, “Can you help me” and “I love you,” which I think doesn’t have any connection at all. But weirdly enough, I did find those useful, maybe useful for someday.

In our brief encounter he was able to teach me directions in Korean and Japanese. It was weird and fun at the same time. The little Korean and Japanese words I know were those that I hear from all the Korean telenovelas and Japanese movies I have watched. It was so cool to share the same interest with a total stranger and in the most unusual place at it. It was cool that Manong Taxi Driver took the time to learn any foreign passengers’ languages. It was useful for him. Now he’s not having the hardest of time with the Korean and Japanese tourists that get to ride his cab.

I was nearing home but I was really enjoying our conversation. To date, I’ve only met a few interesting individuals like that Manong Taxi Driver. Now he made me more excited with the whole idea that if I do go to places, especially to the most unusual of places, imagine how much more interesting people I could come across with?!

So there, Sunday was nice, erratic, unexpected but insanely nice.

Who Needs Shelter

Good-day sunlight
I’d like to say how truly bright you are
You don’t know me but I know you
See, you’re my favorite.

- Jason Mraz

It’s official. I have my very first office crush, ever. No, not the one above, it’s just a photo to show how my office crush makes me feel, sunshiney and nostalgic. And he makes me feel happy and good about myself. It’s lame that he’s the reason why i mostly want to come in earlier to work, and sort of a reason to dress up every now and then. It’s funny.

I don’t know him and he doesn’t know me.

I smiled at him last Valentine’s Day and i saw that he was surprised. That was funny. But somewhere in there i know that he thinks about me, too. He wouldn’t try to look me in the eye everytime i passed by him for nothing right?

I dunno. He makes me feel giddy.

I just wish that I can get a name or something.

Burn Baby Burn

Burn Baby Burn
Disco Inferno!
-The Trammps

We have a close-knit family, since there are a few of us in the clan. The whole clan in my father’s side of the family is give and take 50 people, all inclusive. That’s how few we are. I am attempting to write about a book about it. I’m only scared that I might not be able to put justice in their family genealogy/history. It’s really interesting though. World War, Japanese prison camps, theft, pride, jealousy, wealth, my family’s story is full of drama, and it would be really great to put it in black and white.

So knowing how small and tight knit we are, we often sleep at our Lola’s place when she has no company during the weekend or anytime our cousin can’t come home. My sister and I spent last weekend with her. And you know when you are your Grandma’s place all you will do is eat, eat and eat some more. We helped her do the cooking and the dish washing everytime we are at her place. We made pork bbq’s using a grilling pan (it was awesome I tell you), green salads with balsamic vinegar dressing, ampalaya with shrimp sauce and some more.

It was a fine day at her place, until I decided to help her cook the tikoy for merienda. I’ve always dreaded frying but I really want to help out. So there I was in front of the stove, frying. I used a thong to get a tikoy slice, dipped it in the egg mixture and fry, that’s how it went and I was doing fine until the last piece. The slice slipped through my thong’s grip, and hot oil splashed all over… my hand. I was grimacing. When my lola came in she said, “Kamayin kasi! (Use your hand).” I just smiled at her and just said “Ah, Lola dumulas lang po (It just slipped)” while trying my best to cover the pain. It was excruciating. I prepared the table once more, cleaned the cooking area and then I excused myself and said I will just call Kat in the room.

When I got to Kat I was teary eyed and laughing, I told her what happened and tried to laugh it off. We both got down and headed back to the dining table. I had this lame excuse to put ice on the water bottle, but really I just wanted something to cool my thumb. I don’t know why I had to put a face on in front of my Lola and pretend it didn’t hurt though. It was stupid. And a few minutes later when I can’t disguise it anymore I was searching for toothpaste to soothe the pain. My Lola just had to laugh about it.

I hate frying.

Vincent

Starry
Starry night
Paint your palette blue and grey

- Don McLean

It has been a long time since I last picked up a paintbrush, and I have to say, I missed painting. It was very calming.

And yeah, it still isn’t finished. I could still see my mum’s painting on the background. I really don’t like using acrylic as medium, as you can see, I suck’d at it. I just covered her old painting because I don’t have a spare canvass. Hehe. I asked for permission, don’t worry.

Undergoing MyBlogLog Verification

Last Request

Slow down, lie down
Remember it’s just you and me
Don’t sell out, bow out
Remember how this used to be
I just want you closer
Is that alright?
Baby let’s get closer tonight

- Paolo Nutini

        I’m here all alone in my room, cramping for a self assigned deadline for the project I accepted. It is a lazy Thursday afternoon and I am running out of technical descriptions to describe, say, bio fuels.

        Then this song played. I closed my eyes and instantly, one very memorable part of my life flashed before me. Bio fuel not included.

        (Name) and I were walking along the hallway of the hotel towards a couch by the lounge. (Name), in his coat and tie, had one hand on his pocket and confidently said, “Ang perfect ng couple o.” Without my eyeglasses I could hardly see. I squinted my eyes and asked, “Asan?” (Name) just smiled and pointed to the figures in the huge mirror by the end of the hallway, “Ayun o.”

        That night, I blushed. Today while thinking about it, I die.

        Why? Why? WHY?!!! Yes, that is me crying. Unbelievable, high school seemed like forever but (Name) is still haunting me.

        For the past days, well ok, weeks I have been haunted by bits and pieces, photos and memories of him. Why now? Why am I seeing him now? The last thing I knew about him is that he is still with his girl. And I am still not taken. Why?

        Looking back I’d still be stubborn with my decision not for us to be a couple. For one, we were in grade six. Then, we were still in high school. I just didn’t see the point in having the girlfriend-boyfriend relationship at those ages. Like, how serious is it to have a romantic relationship for a couple of 15 year olds?

        I still bump into him like two to three times in a year and ironically we are just a few blocks apart. I should be bumping into him daily! But no, two of those two or three meetings I had to consciously duck his gaze pa. Sighs. He makes me buckle up! Unbelievable.

        The question remains, why? Why? Why?

        This guy is breaking my heart, Paolo Nutini I mean.

Sing Me Spanish Techno

Traveling at godspeed
over the hills and trails
I have refused my call
pushin’ my lazy sails
- The New Pornographers

Here’s Part 2 of what happened when I had my weekend alone time.

          I received a call from a colleague, asking me if I could accept a project he has been offered. With the dire need I have for financial resurrection I don’t have any right to dismiss such big time offer. Needless to say, I took the project.

          It wasn’t until 6 or 7 in the evening that we had to meet up for the big project somewhere in the recesses of Taft. So there I was, still in the Makati mall, graciously spending some quality alone time, purchasing things I had been dreaming of for days and buying other items I don’t know why I spent my money on.

          To get to the place from Ayala, the best and fastest way, aside from taking a cab is taking the MRT-LRT route, to my delight. I am fascinated with our local modes of transportation so I had the most fun time traversing the city. My friend wanted us to meet in a Manila mall before we head to the client’s place. And I obliged, after all, he gave me the project. But that is beside the point.

Accustomed to riding the first cart, the “female, elderly and children only” cart, and accustomed to listening to my iPod while traveling, I was gazing blankly outside the gloomy avenue. It wasn’t until a few minutes inside the LRT train that I realized they have been using new trains/carts, just like the other LRT line. I forget what LRT line it is, the one that stops along Katipunan. Anyway, when I looked up the ceiling, to my amazement the still clean train is going educational. They are teaching Spanish to local passengers! I was taken aback. Job well done! How come they thought of this just now, props to Instituto Cervantes and the management of the LRT for that.

          I can’t remember the exact Spanish phrase I was repeating over and over again from my Taft to Pedro Gil journey. Spanish is vaguely familiar to me but I would definitely want to speak the language someday. But for now, I just have to make do with the little I know and the fun it gives me especially in an unusual set up like that.

Too bad I didn’t have my digicam with me, I wasn’t able to take a photo. I just put it on mental note, “bring cam, LRT, next time.” And no, I don’t have a camphone either, if you were thinking.

          It was fun. For a moment I thought, every Filipino could now be better and educated metropolitan people, and I mean that in a very good way.